There’s a Bible verse in Luke 16 that I’m sure many, even if they are not a believer, are familiar with:
No servant can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money.
~ Luke 16:13
Be honest: did that verse convict you as much as it did me? It’s okay if it did, because it means God is using it to reveal something within you.
My husband and I re-started Dave Ramsey’s plan to get out of debt back in June, and since then I have been so focused on finding ways to cut expenses, make extra money, and the like. One may say I am obsessed but I’m more just gazelle intense.
How does this all relate? Well, this verse helped me realize that I may have been too focused on getting out of debt instead of focusing on the one who created me. So this coming week, I will be refocusing. I have to take a step back and say, “It’s fine that I want to get out of debt as quickly as possible, but I need to remember who I serve first and foremost and whose money I’m managing.”
If you didn’t know the answer to who, it’s God, by the way.
Who else can relate to this? We get so caught up in our lives that we completely forget the most important person in our lives! It’s embarrassing to say, but it happens.
Although I am still looking at different ways to make money to pay off our debt faster, I know now – more like, I was reminded – that we will become debt free in God’s timing, which is always better than our own timing.
With all this said, here is this week’s question: in an honest assessment of yourselves, who/what do you believe you’re putting first and why? What can you do to shift the focus back to Christ?
Have a great day, y’all!
-The Optimistic Momma
P.S. Remember that blog post I did a while back in regards to my shopping addiction? I’ll (sort of) be addressing it further in my next post, so stay tuned for that!
Being a stay-at-home mom is the most underrated, and yet most difficult job – in my opinion – that there is. It is not a walk in the park, as some may think. You don’t just get to sit around and do nothing all day long, or do whatever you want to do when you want to. No, here’s is what a typical day looks like for me…
Waking up early because if I don’t, I don’t get to have time with Jesus or enjoy my coffee before Samuel wakes up at 7am. Once he’s up, it’s go time: breakfast for him (I can’t eat when he’s around because then I run the risk of him begging for all of my food), change the overnight diaper, and play with him or attempt to let him play on his own while I try to get other things done.
After he’s been up for a while, I try to put him down for a morning nap if he needs it – some days he does and others he skips it and goes right to the afternoon nap (not sure what he’s doing currently). Even if he’s sitting there rubbing his eyes and yawning, he fights the nap tooth and nail. I go in multiple times to try and encourage him to nap and in between my attempts, I try to get things done like eat, wash my face, get dressed, make the bed, and wash any dishes in the sink. Some days, it gets to a point where, for my mental sanity, I have to let him cry it out because if I keep going in I get frustrated.
Some days I give up trying to get him to take a nap – even if he needs it – and either go do some errands or let him play until he tires himself out. Give him his morning snack between 10:00-10:30am, and lunch is at noon. After lunch is, usually, my one guaranteed nap from him so that is when I try to get some stuff done but more often than not I’m so wiped out from dealing with him up to this point I sit on the couch with my computer doing nothing.
He wakes up from his afternoon nap at about 2:00-3:00pm and has his afternoon snack. I let him play on his own or I play with him. Around 3:30-4:00pm, I try to get dinner started if I’m making something. This is usually where it all hits the fan with Samuel, because he just so happens to get fussy when I’m cooking. So lately, I’m making dinner with a fussy toddler hanging onto my leg for dear life.
That has been what my days have looked like lately. At this point, you have probably gathered that I am venting and that is because blogging is my outlet. It is what makes me feel better.
In the end, for anyone that thought being a stay-at-home mom was a walk in the park, you would be wrong. As I mentioned, I think it is the hardest job there is.
And yet, I do still genuinely enjoy it most days. I get to watch Samuel develop and grow and spend time with him. I don’t have to put him in daycare that is not affordable by any means. I’m honestly one of the lucky ones, even though days like today I’d love to rip my hair out.
How many of you have felt this way? Let me know in the comments what got you through the harder days.
Until next time!
~The Optimistic Momma
P.S. A new video went up on my new YouTube channel! You can check it out right here. Leave a comment on the video to let me know you came from my blog fam.
Recently, a friend of mine made a post about how to be more in love with your husband. She brought up some great points but the one that stuck out to me the most is, sometimes you only need a day to reconnect versus a whole weekend.
So, I’d like to do a spinoff of sorts from her original post: how to be more in love with your husband with kids. Here are the things I’ve learned in this area.
Reconnect After the Kids Go to Bed
Because of Chris’ job, the time he gets off of work varies greatly; some days he’s home at about 2:00-3:00pm, and others it’s about 5:30-6:00pm. Either way when Samuel goes to bed, that’s time for us to spend together. Sometimes that means cuddling up and watching a movie, doing our own thing but talking at the same time, etc. It may not always be extravagant, but anything to just relax with each other does wonders for our relationship!
Keep Dating!
Go on dates! Sure, they say to do that anyways even before kids, but this becomes even more important after kids. It’s uninterrupted time away for the two of you to just relax, talk, and enjoy each other’s presence. Plus the time leading up to the date itself to get all prettied up is fun for us ladies!
Tidy for Them
I have noticed that Chris really appreciates it when I keep our place tidy, and I know I definitely appreciate it when he helps me out by doing the same. In my opinion, doing this for your spouse shows them that you would much rather spend time with them, solely focused on them, instead of stressing about the mess around you. Trust me, no one wants to be stressed out about that when you’re trying to enjoy an evening with your husband!
Read the Word Together
Seeing your spouse’s love of God is seriously amazing. Sure, you need to be connected emotionally and physically, but don’t discount being connected spiritually to them. Some of the moments where I love Chris most involve us reading through a book of the Bible together and discussing what God is saying.
In the End
Be intentional when it comes to making time with your spouse. It will definitely go a long way, and will show them how much you love them.
So, ladies, what are some ways that help you be more in love with your spouse? Share them in a comment below!
Going off topic for the end of this blog post, but my YouTube channel is officially UP! My first video is giving you 50 facts about myself. Be sure to go check it out here, and leave me a comment on that video letting me know you came from the blog and also if you share something in common with me that I mention in the video.
I look forward to talking to y’all here, as well as over there!
Yes, cockroaches. The day I found them when I came to inspect the apartment, they did bug bomb our place but even after that, we found them. We’ve been finding them for about a week since. On July 2nd, the whole thing hit a head for me. I made garlic chicken for dinner and was SO excited to try it. We left it out briefly to put Samuel to bed. Came back, and they were all over the chicken. We ended up having to toss it because we didn’t want to chance it. That was the last straw. From about 6:30pm until I fell asleep I cried. Yeah, that was about a good three and a half to four hours worth of crying.
I am extremely frustrated, angry, sad, yet still excited to have our own place. So many emotions, but the first three ring true the most. Since that night however, we have bought some roach traps and bait to kill them. We haven’t seen many since, so that’s a relief!
I also feel distanced from God, but that is also because I haven’t had time to spend with Him since we moved in. My time has been dedicated to unpacking (over halfway done now) and building furniture. On top of all of this, our Internet wasn’t installed yet (have it now), and we’re missing the pillows for our new couch (thanks IKEA). Everything that could go wrong during a move, has gone wrong.
I guess all of this just goes to show you that life is unpredictable, unfortunately. You can plan all you want, but plans can, and will, change. Through the process, you have to trust that God has got it all in His hands, because He does.
For the last few months, I have had to remind myself of Jeremiah 29:11. It has been the verse I prayed over the entire move, living in this new apartment, everything. That verse has been my reminder that everything will work out. For the other mommas out there who are struggling to understand what is going on in their lives or what God is doing, do not be afraid. His perfect love will cast out your fear and He knows what He is doing with your life.
Mommas, what is something you’re struggling with right now? How can I and others in this small community pray for you?
I’m finally going to say it: I have a shopping addiction.
That got serious real fast, didn’t it?
But seriously, I have a problem. Unfortunately, I am one of those people where if I see something I (think) I want, I have to get it immediately in my mind. It may be because it’s on sale, or I just think it would be perfect to have for whatever reason. There’s really no rhyme or reason most of the time, just that I want it.
Thankfully, God has been working on my heart regarding this for some time now. A few months ago, Chris and I did a reading plan on the YouVersion app discussing the topic of money and what God’s Word says about it. All of the usual things that I know but never implemented popped out immediately: what you have is a gift from God alone, borrower is slave to the lender, etc. I had studied these things in the past, but it wasn’t until we started this reading plan that it all finally hit me. Granted I’m not perfect about it still, but I’d like to think I’m better at handling myself.
I find it interesting that God changes the things that you want changed immediately, over time. For example, my mindset typically is very depressive if I’m upset. (Ironic considering my blog’s name, right?) I have been like this for a long time, and I pray constantly for God to change me and make me better. It frustrates me when He doesn’t. However that’s the thing about God: He doesn’t give it to you immediately because if He did, you may end up putting Him off to the side because you didn’t have to rely on Him throughout the process. Of course I don’t remember that in the moment, but it’s true.
In the end, it’s actually a good thing that He doesn’t make us better or “perfect” overnight. Besides, we are not meant to be perfect until we get to Heaven. So if you’re like me, and you’re stuck in this rut of, “I’m not good enough,” or “I keep messing up,” give it to God. In time, He WILL make you better but on His timing. It’s a hard thing to remember, but surely not impossible. One thing you can certainly always remember and have running through your mind, though, is You are worthy. Right now, as you are. That includes me, too. Related to this, I recommend checking out my friend’s blog, The Reluctant Bride. She recently made a great post about worthiness, so check it out here.
Mommas, let’s all come together on this; who else struggles with self worth and trusting God’s plan to make them better? Let me know in the comments below and let’s get a conversation going!
Oh hi! You may or may not remember me, but I used to update this blog quite regularly. Then, life got crazy and took over. So much has changed since I started this blog, and I won’t boggle you down with all of the reasons. I’ll just jump right into what has changed…
First, I got a full-time office job in mid-September of 2018 and that was a handful! I no longer had time during the weekdays to do anything but work. However, the job had been something my husband, Chris, and I had been praying for so we were extremely grateful! Since I was working on the weekdays, my weekends became all about spending time with Chris and my son, Samuel, and tidying up our living space.
Second, I now have a one year old! It still feels surreal to say that. Technically, he’s now 15 months old but he’s still one. He is no longer a baby, but a toddler, complete with walking, attempting to say new words, moving into the beginning stages of potty training, all of it! #crazy
Third: this may or may not be something I’d mentioned in previous posts. Since May 2018, we’ve been living with my in laws until we were able to get back on our own feet financially and get our own place. Well, I’m pleased to say… WE ARE MOVING OUT. By the beginning of July, we will be in our own place again and words can not describe how excited I am for this! It is going to be amazing to have my own home to decorate the way I want to.
Finally, my husband has a really great job! That job is so great actually, that I will be leaving mine by the end of June to be a stay-at-home parent. With leaving my job comes some exciting adventures, including picking this blog back up and starting/staying consistent with… a YouTube channel! This is something that, as I know I have mentioned, I have wanted to do on and off for years now. However, I never knew what I wanted to talk about or if I’d even have time to keep up with one. Now I will have that time. My channel’s focus will be on all things lifestyle, being a mom, some beauty, and more. As an idea, look up Natalie Bennett or Sarah Therese on YouTube, both of whose videos I enjoy watching regularly!
I know that’s a lot all at once for an update post, so my apologies. Rest assured however that more exciting things are coming!
If you made it to the end of this blog post, you are definitely an OG follower of mine and I would just like to say THANK YOU. I know this blog has not been updated in a while, but the fact that you came to read this post is amazing to me. Also, please comment on this post or send me a message through my website letting me know what you’d like to see on my YouTube channel! Until next time, God bless you!
I am a worry wart. I always have been, and I’m not proud of that. You’d think being a Christian would mean I don’t worry since God tells us not to, but I do. Every little thing gets me slightly panicked. For example, ‘Will we have enough money to afford our bills?’ or ‘Did I come across as rude, uninterested, etc.?’ Little things to big things, you name it and I’ve probably worried about it.
In saying all of that, one section of Matthew 6 always pops back in my view at one point or another. Specifically, verses 25-34:
“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
Let me tell you, those first couple of verses lists things that I genuinely worry about every day. I realize that in comparison to some, I have everything that I need. Still, I worry, especially when it comes to buying clothes and things like that (another post for another week). I may have already mentioned this on the blog once or twice before (or not), but I tend to be a bit of a people please. That is definitely not something I am proud to admit, but I am. I have been for as long as I can remember and I don’t even know why.
My other thing that conflicts with this verse in my head is, I like to look semi-stylish. I like to wear clothes that are flattering and I like to look good, not just from the clothes I wear but body-wise too. Again, kind of goes back to my people pleasing.
So, this is something that God has really been bringing to my attention over the last few months. It is something that I’ve been trying to figure out how to find the balance that God wants me to have. It is so hard, though. It is really hard to let go of your earthly desires and desire Jesus alone, especially living in a world that is so focused on a “me” mentality. It’s hard not to think the same way sometimes.
Once again, I must ask: who else struggles with this? How do you remind yourself that you are not part of this world, but of Heaven? Is it wrong to want earthly things like clothes, books, etc.? I want to hear your thoughts and get a discussion going on this.
I’ve been posting on Sundays lately and I apologize for missing this past Sunday. Chris had the day off from his new job and we all got to spend time together as a family. Family first, you know? Now for today’s post…
Does anyone else go through phases in your faith where you’re so on fire for God, you never miss a day when it comes to reading your Bible and praying, and other days you completely forget and it doesn’t cross your mind at all? I’m there right now. I go through this all the time unfortunately. I wish I knew why or what the reason was. I think part of it has to do with getting so caught up in my own life and the things I want to do that I completely forget about Him by the end of the day. When I do finally realize I haven’t spent any time with Him, it’s too late because I’m going to sleep.
I have to wonder, too, if maybe it has something to do with the fact that I don’t like to just sit still and be quiet (unless I’m reading a good book).
I really don’t know the reason, and this post is becoming more of like a journal entry today.
So anyways, please tell me that I’m not the only one who goes through this. I’m sure I’m not, but it definitely feels like it sometimes. I still believe and trust in Him, but I sometimes put Him on the backburner when He should be the absolute first person on my mind every morning (aside from my family). I get caught up in myself and my own thoughts that I don’t invite Him into them because more often than not, they’re thoughts about myself (what I want to do, what I want to buy, where I want to go, etc.). I guess this is an area where I need to be praying to Him about helping me stay on track consistently once and for all.
Now I want to know for sure: are there any other believers out there like myself? Maybe I’m making it more works based than it needs to be (it is a relationship after all). I want to hear a little bit about your journey.
Samuel is officially six months old today! It honestly feels like just yesterday that he was born, but time is just flying by. To celebrate this literally once in a lifetime event, I thought it would be fun to share with you my labor and delivery story. I realize other mothers may share this on the baby’s first birthday, but I am impatient and can’t wait to share it!
To start this story, we’ll go back to a few days before he was born on March 9th. So that same week on Monday, I had my weekly check-up with my OB and my mom came along with me. If you’re a parent, you know how that goes: they make sure you’re doing okay, check you, etc. Before my doctor even came in, the nurse practitioner checked my blood pressure. It was quite high, and she said she’d come in after my doctor did and re-check it. My doctor comes in, checks me and everything. I was one centimeter dilated (I was 39 weeks) and I believe 50% effaced. Samuel had not dropped either. I was showing no signs of giving birth, and that was fine because his due date wasn’t technically until the 14th. Still, I was anxious and wanted to meet my baby!
My doctor leaves and the nurse comes back in to check my BP again. It hadn’t gone down all that much. With that, they decided to have me come in that same week on Wednesday to check again. Wednesday comes around and this time Chris goes with me. We go through the same routine of the nurse checking my BP, which was still high, and the doctor coming in (one of the doctors I’d seen before but not my doctor). I think she checked me again and then said she was going to speak with my doctor and be right back. The whole time, Chris and I were thinking, “This is it. We may be facing an induction.” Low and behold, the doctor came back and confirmed just that. We would be coming back to the hospital that evening and I would start Cervadil to begin the induction process since my body was not even close to being ready to give birth.
Later that night, we got checked into the hospital and they started me on the Cervadil. I was able to get some sleep, or as much as you can in a hospital bed.
The next morning, I was able to get something to eat before they started me on the Pitocin which was great because once you are on Pitocin you can’t eat. AT ALL. That part sucked. Contractions started but they were not that bad. I was able to get through them. About midday, the doctor decided we could break my water at that point. Once they did that, all hell broke loose. The contractions really started up after that, and they aren’t kidding when they say it’s painful. I got two to three centimeters in before I requested the epidural and thankfully they were quick to get it to me. After that though, I was confined to the hospital bed.
Again, hospital beds are not comfortable.
I tried to get some sleep but it was pretty hard. Plus, I was starving so I was eating ice chips all night since that’s all you’re able to have at that point.
The next morning came (birth day) and the nurse on duty at that point said I was at about an eight or nine. My doctor came in later and checked me as well.
Here is where it gets rough.
After my doctor checked me, she said I was at maybe a seven. At this point I was thinking, Are you kidding me?! She was even starting to talk about a potential cesarean section since I was progressing so slowly. After she left the room, Chris, my mom, and I started to pray. My goal the whole pregnancy was to avoid a C-section entirely and now it seemed like that would be the only way.
Twenty minutes later I said, “I have to push.”
My doctor came back in and checked me, and confirmed that I was indeed ready to push. Everything was set up and ready to go. I pushed for an hour and a half. Thankfully with the epidural it wasn’t too painful. It was more just intense pressure and tiring as all get out. At 10:25am on March 9th, after 36 hours in labor, Samuel FINALLY came into the world at 7lbs and 9oz.
In the end, my whole birth plan went out the window but that’s okay. His birth went just as God intended it to, and it was beautiful either way.
Now here we are six months later, and he is just growing so fast! At his last appointment to check on his eczema, he weighed about 15, almost 16, pounds. He loves to play, loves to eat, and is a huge talker! He’s not quite sitting up on his own yet, but tummy time is paying off and he doesn’t hate it as much anymore (he can go for about five or more minutes at a time now!). He still doesn’t like bath time but that’s okay, and he hates his skincare routine for his eczema (medicine, lotion, Vaseline). All in all, he’s growing so fast and I can’t wait to see all that’s ahead for him and watch him continue to grow and learn! Plus, those eyes are so beautiful!!
I’m curious about y’all’s birth stories. Did you go all natural, have a C-section, or were you induced as well? I want to hear all about it.
Happy one month to this blog! I never thought I’d stick with a blog long enough to say that. I know I’ve most likely said it before here, but I’ve tried blogging numerous times in the past. Those times never really stuck. Now it has, and I’m so proud of myself for sticking with it!
I’ve seen many people do these kinds of posts and I’m inspired to do the same from my experience thus far. If you have read blog posts like these before, I’m sure some of these will look familiar (and for good reason, because they’re true!).
Without further ado, here are the things I’ve learned in my one month of blogging…
It takes way more time than you think. Time management is key!
Especially if you are a parent like me, this is crucial! If I do not calendar block some time on my Google Calendar to either write or interact with other bloggers, the work it takes to make and manage a blog just doesn’t get done. Therefore, I usually work in times to work on this blog in the early hours of the morning (some days I have to be at my retail job at 6am, so I mean EARLY!) or when Samuel is napping and I calendar block based off of when he usually naps.
2. No, it’s not a “get rich quick” thing.
Truth time: I have not made a dime off of this blog! I’m also not really focused on that right now. I’m more focused on sharing my experiences and praying it makes an impact on anyone who reads it. Plus, I just want to get the habit in place for a while. Don’t go into blogging expecting to make money right off the bat!
3. It’s a great way to express your thoughts and inspire others.
Through this experience, I have been able to give myself great reminders about being a parent. For example, learning how to be flexible in any situation and that the image of the “perfect” mom I have in my head is unrealistic.
4. You don’t have to make yourself appear as “perfect.”
Like I said, my image of the “perfect” mom is unrealistic so why would I want to create an image of myself as that? I have been and will continue to be very open on this blog. Some days my posts will be very positive (hence my blog name), and other days they may just be more negative sounding or sound frustrated. Whatever the case may be, I want to share it. Our culture paints the picture of, you must be the mom who always has it together and looks good doing it. Motherhood just isn’t that way!
I hope this post has given you some insight into what it’s like to be a blogger. Now I want to hear from you. If you are NOT a blogger, what other questions do you have about being a blogger? And if you ARE a blogger already, what is something you’ve learned since becoming a blogger that I may not have mentioned? I can’t wait to hear from y’all!
The Optimistic Momma 